Dear Etty, 

I recently collaborated with other members on a project.  I felt elated by our creative work.  We immediately received a complaint from a member who told us that the previous product was better.  Naturally, I felt deflated.  Isn’t our Society supposed to be a place where we receive support for trying new ideas? 

Disappointed Gal 

Dear DG, 

Creativity and initiative are causes for celebration.  Feedback is also important if we are interested in developing genuine relationships.  How then do we deliver criticism that is honest and does not shut off creative expression?  By comparing the new with the old product, the member may have thought he was being helpful.  He was probably unaware that his words were judgmental.  I believe you would have been more receptive had he delivered empathetic criticism.  That is, criticism that used positive language and took into account feelings and needs. 

The following approach represents an example of empathetic criticism.  “Your initiative in creating a new product is great.  So that we can be certain that the product works for our members as well as you expect, would you be receptive to undertaking an informal survey after people get used to the new product.”  Another approach to empathetic criticism would first inquire about the change before offering a comment.  For example, “I appreciate your team’s effort to improve our product.  Perhaps you can tell me about the thinking that went into the change.”    

I hope that we will remember the importance of empathetic criticism when providing feedback.    

                                      Etty

Are you feeling uncertain about an ethical quandary?  Send an e-mail to steamer64@cox.net